grief

We all experience the unavoidable moments of loss and departure, separation and detachment, the removal of loves that we naively believed would remain with us for the duration of our lives. The tearing away is painful and mind numbingly disconcerting regardless of how aware we were of the possibility. Growing up no one prepares us for these moments, tutoring our emotions in the fine art of corporeal fragility and existential mortality. 

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We all know we will die but it would seem that life needs a healthy dose of denial in order for it to make sense. My youthful innocence was too busy figuring out how to live let alone consider any any kind of possible expiration. As we get older we begin to feel the frailty of our human condition as our vitality comes under the scrutiny of the ageing process. Vulnerability becomes our companion as we combat our denial and face the contradictions that life throws at us.

‘Grief is the price we pay for love’  - Henri Nouwen

If we have truely loved something then grief will be the antidote for letting go and moving on into the next permutation of the life that reshapes ahead of us. Grief is the cathartic agent of recalibration that regulates our coping mechanisms as we process what it means to move on. 

Letting go is learning to live without and holding on is the practice of remembering the special moments that have shaped our personal journey. We are the by-product of those who have influenced our becoming, a collection of significant markers that have come together to format our consciousness.

‘Love is Mix Tape’  - Rob Sheffield

Learning to remember is like an old mix tape that you put together to fuel the muse of reminiscence and recollection. Memories are the backing track of life’s narrative, the rhythm of human interaction and implication. Forgetfulness creeps up on us like a thief in the night robbing us of our precious memories, hence the need for us to diligently gather the remnants of commemoration in order to let antiquity lead us into a wholesome futurity.

My future is influenced by my past, a foundation of recognition that provides the platform for that which I am becoming, as I carry a torch of hope for future generations.

This blog is dedicated to a good and faithful friend who has passed over to the other side of life where eternal rest has greeted him. Graham, you will be greatly missed by all of those who had the privilege of knowing you. We will grieve for a while so we can learn to let go of what once was, all the while putting together the mix tape of our favourite memories. R.I.P